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Post by ---------a on Mar 21, 2008 13:43:24 GMT -1
Ringo Star and Paul McCartney are sat talking. Ringo asks Paul if he will ever go down on one knee ever again. He replies no, and i told you before to call her Heather.
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Post by T C on Mar 21, 2008 13:44:42 GMT -1
that's an old one richie
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Mar 25, 2008 10:11:39 GMT -1
A soldier in the parachute regiment has been stationed in Switzerland for the last 2 years. He recently married a local girl who can wash up with one hand, cook tea with the other, dust with one foot while sucking his cock as she opens a beer with her arse.
Shes a swiss army wife. ;D
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Post by MozzaBedfordSpur on Mar 25, 2008 12:32:19 GMT -1
A soldier in the parachute regiment has been stationed in Switzerland for the last 2 years. He recently married a local girl who can wash up with one hand, cook tea with the other, dust with one foot while sucking his cock as she opens a beer with her arse. Shes a swiss army wife. ;D Brilliant ;D
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 1, 2008 14:54:13 GMT -1
what does a catholic priest have in common with a pint of guiness? black coat,white collar & you need to watch your arse if you get a dodgy one.
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Post by T C on Apr 1, 2008 20:46:40 GMT -1
what does a catholic priest have in common with a pint of guiness? black coat,white collar & you need to watch your arse if you get a dodgy one.
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Post by T C on Apr 2, 2008 17:02:40 GMT -1
The residents of Farnborough have been asked to leave their landing lights off at night
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 3, 2008 7:44:24 GMT -1
I was in the bookstore the other day and came across a book titled "Living with Parkinsons Disesase and Arthritis". I looked at the back to see what the critics had to say about it.
"After an initial shakey start, I just couldn't put this book down."
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 3, 2008 14:06:38 GMT -1
After breaking the world record by a full 5 minutes on the worlds most dangerous bucking bronco a cowboy is interviewed. The reporter asks"That was amazing, what's your secret?" He replies "My wife's an epileptic."
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Post by T C on Apr 3, 2008 19:49:38 GMT -1
I was in the bookstore the other day and came across a book titled "Living with Parkinsons Disesase and Arthritis". I looked at the back to see what the critics had to say about it. "After an initial shakey start, I just couldn't put this book down." PMSL
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 3, 2008 19:55:12 GMT -1
A lady in labour is shouting the usual "Get this out of me, give me the drugs!" She turns to her boyfriend and says "You're the one who did this to me you fucker." He casually replies "If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your arse but you said 'fuck off it'll be too painful' " ;D
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Post by T C on Apr 3, 2008 20:39:18 GMT -1
A lady in labour is shouting the usual "Get this out of me, give me the drugs!" She turns to her boyfriend and says "You're the one who did this to me you fucker." He casually replies "If you remember, I wanted to stick it up your arse but you said 'fuck off it'll be too painful' " ;D
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 4, 2008 18:26:21 GMT -1
What's the closest thing to a woman's period?
Your Salary - It comes once a month, lasts between 5 and 7 days and if it doesn't come your fucked!
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 8, 2008 8:10:48 GMT -1
Breaking News...
The Olympic flame has gone out in Paris....just proves that she will stick anything up her fanny.
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 9, 2008 14:43:36 GMT -1
Heather Mills has been spotted combing the beach in Arbroath for a new leg .......
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 9, 2008 14:51:25 GMT -1
Police have denied claims that more body parts have been found in Arbroath. It turns out the C*nt lying on the beach was Gordon Brown sunbathing.
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 9, 2008 15:39:49 GMT -1
I don't usually buy FHM magazine, but I saw an advert for this month's edition that said they had shots from a topless photoshoot with Keeley Hazell. So I thought; what the hell, I'll treat myself and splash out on a copy. That's me barred from WH Smiths for the foreseeable future...
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Post by MozzaBedfordSpur on Apr 10, 2008 11:13:01 GMT -1
I was in the bookstore the other day and came across a book titled "Living with Parkinsons Disesase and Arthritis". I looked at the back to see what the critics had to say about it. "After an initial shakey start, I just couldn't put this book down." I love this one
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Post by Pete the Wolf on Apr 10, 2008 12:00:34 GMT -1
What's the closest thing to a woman's period? Your Salary - It comes once a month, lasts between 5 and 7 days and if it doesn't come your fucked! Brilliant! ;D
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Post by CmonYouSpurs on Apr 12, 2008 18:16:59 GMT -1
A teacher asks her class to use the word 'contagious' in a sentence.
Bob says "I've got Mumps and they were contagious".
Katie say's "My Gran had a bug and it was contagious".
Little johnny jumps up and says "Our neighbour is painting his house with a 2 inch brush and my dad says it'll take the cuntagious!"
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