Post by Neko Bazu on Dec 15, 2007 16:02:07 GMT -1
Quoted from one of my friend's Livejournals - one good reason to work in customer services is in the hope of getting calls like this!
;D
I work for a regional cell phone company that is known for its Trusted Blue-Shirt Advisors. I'm a 3rd shifter...the pace is more enjoyable, and the crazy call ratio is pretty high.
Customer WTF-ness from a while ago:
NG = Nice Girl
BB = Background Boyfriend
I hear the Phone Call God say "Call," in my ear, and I take myself off of mute.
Me: *standard greeting*
NG: Hi, I want to suspend my companion line please.
Me: Sure! Could I have the mobile number you're calling about with the area code please?
NG: GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY FACE!
Me: *startled because she had been so nice* I beg your pardon, ma'am?!
NG: Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't talking to you. *turns snarly* I was talking to this lowdown, nasty sonovabitch in front of me. The mobile number I want you to suspend is XXX-XXX-XXXX.
Me: Oh, ok. I was just concerned in case I had upset you in some way.
NG: No, you're just fine.
*proceed with verification, and I can hear BB in the background saying something*
Me: *when a phone is suspended per a customer's request, I have to note if it is lost/stolen or if it is being suspended for personal reasons* OK, now is this phone --
NG: *interrupting BB...and me* You dumb cocksucker! You got with that leaky ho and fucked around on me! I ain't got time to be goin' down to the clinic 'cause you got with some bitch with the clap! You get all up in that nasty ho's leaky-ass crack and I shut your phone off! Fuck you!
Me: *On mute, trying to keep my composure*
*BB mumbles in the background, sounding contrite-but-not-really, like he's saying, "But honey, my dick slipped" or something equally stupid*
NG: *to me* You still there, baby?
Me: *taking myself off mute* Yes, I'm here. I assume the line is being suspended for personal reasons?
NG: Yes, personal reasons are fine. *to BB* When I get off the phone with this nice lady, I'm gonna call my ex and we are gonna hook up. I haven't had some real lovin' in a while. *to me* Is the phone off?
Me: Yes, I have suspended that line for you. Just call us back when you want to unsuspend that line for you, ok?
NG: I don't think that'll be for a while -- this asshole gotta pay for my clinic visit since he done screwed that leaky, nasty bitch.
Me: I can understand your reasoning, ma'am. Try to have a better night.
NG: *very sweetly* Have a good night too, boo.
Me: *standard closing, after which I took myself off the phone and laughed for a solid minute*
Customer WTF-ness from a while ago:
NG = Nice Girl
BB = Background Boyfriend
I hear the Phone Call God say "Call," in my ear, and I take myself off of mute.
Me: *standard greeting*
NG: Hi, I want to suspend my companion line please.
Me: Sure! Could I have the mobile number you're calling about with the area code please?
NG: GET THE FUCK OUTTA MY FACE!
Me: *startled because she had been so nice* I beg your pardon, ma'am?!
NG: Oh, I'm sorry, I wasn't talking to you. *turns snarly* I was talking to this lowdown, nasty sonovabitch in front of me. The mobile number I want you to suspend is XXX-XXX-XXXX.
Me: Oh, ok. I was just concerned in case I had upset you in some way.
NG: No, you're just fine.
*proceed with verification, and I can hear BB in the background saying something*
Me: *when a phone is suspended per a customer's request, I have to note if it is lost/stolen or if it is being suspended for personal reasons* OK, now is this phone --
NG: *interrupting BB...and me* You dumb cocksucker! You got with that leaky ho and fucked around on me! I ain't got time to be goin' down to the clinic 'cause you got with some bitch with the clap! You get all up in that nasty ho's leaky-ass crack and I shut your phone off! Fuck you!
Me: *On mute, trying to keep my composure*
*BB mumbles in the background, sounding contrite-but-not-really, like he's saying, "But honey, my dick slipped" or something equally stupid*
NG: *to me* You still there, baby?
Me: *taking myself off mute* Yes, I'm here. I assume the line is being suspended for personal reasons?
NG: Yes, personal reasons are fine. *to BB* When I get off the phone with this nice lady, I'm gonna call my ex and we are gonna hook up. I haven't had some real lovin' in a while. *to me* Is the phone off?
Me: Yes, I have suspended that line for you. Just call us back when you want to unsuspend that line for you, ok?
NG: I don't think that'll be for a while -- this asshole gotta pay for my clinic visit since he done screwed that leaky, nasty bitch.
Me: I can understand your reasoning, ma'am. Try to have a better night.
NG: *very sweetly* Have a good night too, boo.
Me: *standard closing, after which I took myself off the phone and laughed for a solid minute*
;D