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Post by Roaster©®™ on Oct 26, 2007 22:28:13 GMT -1
Just been outside for ciggie - and as my house backs onto a play area frequented by adolescents after dark (empty beer cans, scab ends of roaches and occasionally a pissed dickhead who's climed over my fence) I checked out bottom of my garden.
Nowt to report - all was quiet! Till I strolled back towards my house and I heard a 'banging sound' and 'frantic pants'!
As nobody was at the play are I looked up and I noticed my neighbours bedroom window open (which is very unusual) but it is mild tonight! Thinking to myself "Way Hay" then "Eugh" - cos she's a bit of a steg I then heard "Wider, Wider babe"!
And I don't know why but drawing on my ciggie I said (a bit too loudly) "Go on son - get your bollocks in too!"
Funnily enough the banging and panting stopped immediately -and within seconds their bedroom window slammed shut!
What words will be exchangeable between us in the morning?
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Post by Nik *QPR* on Oct 26, 2007 22:30:38 GMT -1
Just been outside for ciggie - and as my house backs onto a play area frequented by adolescents after dark (empty beer cans, scab ends of roaches and occasionally a pissed dickhead who's climed over my fence) I checked out bottom of my garden. Nowt to report - all was quiet! Till I strolled back towards my house and I heard a 'banging sound' and 'frantic pants'! As nobody was at the play are I looked up and I noticed my neighbours bedroom window open (which is very unusual) but it is mild tonight! Thinking to myself "Way Hay" then "Eugh" - cos she's a bit of a steg I then heard "Wider, Wider babe"! And I don't know why but drawing on my ciggie I said (a bit too loudly) "Go on son - get your bollocks in too!" Funnily enough the banging and panting stopped immediately -and within seconds their bedroom window slammed shut! What words will be exchangeable between us in the morning? How about: "You get a video of that Mate?" ;D |
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Post by Coxy™ on Oct 26, 2007 22:33:08 GMT -1
pmsl ;D
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Post by Roaster©®™ on Oct 26, 2007 22:36:21 GMT -1
If it was on general release it would be video nasty!  |
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Post by Roaster©®™ on Oct 26, 2007 22:42:12 GMT -1
And because of the generally weird weather we've been having over the summer his rose bushes are now over-growing my fence (and they're nasty, sharply thorned littled fuckers) - I reckon shouting across "Any chance you can trim the bush?" would be bang out of order!  |
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Post by Nik *QPR* on Oct 26, 2007 22:54:39 GMT -1
And because of the generally weird weather we've been having over the summer his rose bushes are now over-growing my fence (and they're nasty, sharply thorned littled fuckers) - I reckon shouting across "Any chance you can trim the bush?" would be bang out of order! Just as long as they haven't got any holes that need shovelling!! |
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Post by Roaster©®™ on Oct 26, 2007 23:06:08 GMT -1
Personally I beleive I've done mankind a favour - if only temporarily - in that I've prevented the birth of another ugly baby!
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Post by unkownperson on Oct 27, 2007 9:29:10 GMT -1
So how good was it then? |
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Goalposts for Jumpers
Sunday League Player
Posting on message boards is a lot like making love to a beautiful woman.....
Posts: 44
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Post by Goalposts for Jumpers on Oct 27, 2007 12:30:24 GMT -1
Ro, question....this shagging couple - the Goths who turn into bats by night and go hunting for moths or the twat with the attitide about his driveway?
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Goalposts for Jumpers
Sunday League Player
Posting on message boards is a lot like making love to a beautiful woman.....
Posts: 44
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Post by Goalposts for Jumpers on Oct 27, 2007 12:31:15 GMT -1
Just been outside for ciggie - and as my house backs onto a play area frequented by adolescents after dark (empty beer cans, scab ends of roaches and occasionally a pissed dickhead who's climed over my fence) I checked out bottom of my garden. Nowt to report - all was quiet! Till I strolled back towards my house and I heard a 'banging sound' and 'frantic pants'! As nobody was at the play are I looked up and I noticed my neighbours bedroom window open (which is very unusual) but it is mild tonight! Thinking to myself "Way Hay" then "Eugh" - cos she's a bit of a steg I then heard "Wider, Wider babe"! And I don't know why but drawing on my ciggie I said (a bit too loudly) "Go on son - get your bollocks in too!" Funnily enough the banging and panting stopped immediately -and within seconds their bedroom window slammed shut! What words will be exchangeable between us in the morning? I thoughts frantic pants was a new kind of musical underwear! |
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Post by Roaster©®™ on Oct 30, 2007 22:34:43 GMT -1
Ro, question....this shagging couple - the Goths who turn into bats by night and go hunting for moths or the twat with the attitide about his driveway? Goths mate! Wanker with attitude ain't been around for a week or so! |
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Post by HURLOCK on Oct 31, 2007 8:36:06 GMT -1
Please tell me what device you use to make it wider, as you've been doing a good job with the mars bars!
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Post by Teesside White on Oct 31, 2007 9:26:09 GMT -1
Ro, question....this shagging couple - the Goths who turn into bats by night and go hunting for moths or the twat with the attitide about his driveway? Goths mate! Wanker with attitude ain't been around for a week or so! **gasp** have u killed him?? |
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