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Post by GeoFox on Apr 5, 2006 15:05:24 GMT -1
Q. What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Derby? A. A leisure centre. Prepare for repercussions from Gresley now Clo! But this one is absolutely class - you just have to laugh! ;D ;D
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 17:00:26 GMT -1
Q. What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Derby? A. A leisure centre. Prepare for repercussions from Gresley now Clo! But this one is absolutely class - you just have to laugh! ;D ;D very old though - used to be with wales instead of derby!! Come on, keep it up to date!! ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/wink.png)
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 17:05:59 GMT -1
Q. What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Derby? A. A leisure centre. I'm liking you more and more LL... I fecking hate derby scum fans.... I love you too stan!! ![;)](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/wink.png)
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 17:11:30 GMT -1
anothyer old one -
Leicester fan walks into the pub with his dog, walks up to the bar and orders a pint. His dog, starts ranting and raving "fuckin useless bastards, waste of money, no passion and pride - its a fuckin disgrace!!"
Landlord sats "fuck me, thats amazing - whats his problem though??"
Leicester fan retorts "oh, dont mind him mate, he's always like this when we lose!"
barman asks "well...what's he like when you win?"
Bloke says "dunno mate, ive only had him for 3 months!"
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leicesterlass
Trainee
Retired. Catch me on facebook/e-mail on my profile if you wish.
Posts: 8
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Post by leicesterlass on Apr 5, 2006 17:12:51 GMT -1
Q. What do you call a sheep tied to a lamppost in Derby? A. A leisure centre. Prepare for repercussions from Gresley now Clo! But this one is absolutely class - you just have to laugh! ;D ;D Lets call it retribution for what was said about me on the 606 Rams List! ![:P](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/tongue.png)
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Post by saintrich on Apr 5, 2006 17:13:34 GMT -1
saints fc ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/sad.png)
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leicesterlass
Trainee
Retired. Catch me on facebook/e-mail on my profile if you wish.
Posts: 8
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Post by leicesterlass on Apr 5, 2006 17:22:30 GMT -1
saints fc ![:(](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/sad.png) We have a winner!! ;D
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 17:38:18 GMT -1
Prepare for repercussions from Gresley now Clo! But this one is absolutely class - you just have to laugh! ;D ;D Lets call it retribution for what was said about me on the 606 Rams List! ![:P](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/tongue.png) LOL - you have a good memory LL ;D
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 19:58:34 GMT -1
Saddam Hussein has been found guilty of crimes against humanity, and in passing sentence, the judge has ordered that he be sent somewhere where he will be a threat to absolutely NO-ONE
Apparently he's starting up front for Leicester on Saturday!
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Post by GeoFox on Apr 5, 2006 20:00:37 GMT -1
Saddam Hussein has been found guilty of crimes against humanity, and in passing sentence, the judge has ordered that he be sent somewhere where he will be a threat to absolutely NO-ONE Apparently he's starting up front for Leicester on Saturday! So its like that then is it Gresley! LL is obv having an impact on you too!
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Post by Super Danny Webber on Apr 5, 2006 20:02:43 GMT -1
anothyer old one - Leicester fan walks into the pub with his dog, walks up to the bar and orders a pint. His dog, starts ranting and raving "fuckin useless bastards, waste of money, no passion and pride - its a fuckin disgrace!!" Landlord sats "fuck me, thats amazing - whats his problem though??" Leicester fan retorts "oh, dont mind him mate, he's always like this when we lose!" barman asks "well...what's he like when you win?" Bloke says "dunno mate, ive only had him for 3 months!" lol
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 20:05:00 GMT -1
an abused child is in court to hear what future he has.
the judge says "never fear, young boy, you will be sent to live with your uncle david - he will look after you"
the boy begs not to be sent there, saying "but he used to beat me round the head when i was young!"
The judge reconsiders ans says "very well, in which case you will be sent to live with your grandparents - they can look after you"
Again, the boy begs not to be sent there either, stating "but they used to beat me with sticks when i was only a baby"
the judge pauses, deep in thought before finally stating "you leave me no choice, it is a drastic measure i know, but im gonna have to send you to Sunderland - no fucker gets beaten there!!"
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 20:06:38 GMT -1
Saddam Hussein has been found guilty of crimes against humanity, and in passing sentence, the judge has ordered that he be sent somewhere where he will be a threat to absolutely NO-ONE Apparently he's starting up front for Leicester on Saturday! So its like that then is it Gresley! LL is obv having an impact on you too! not really geo, as you will see by the last joke, i didnt even mention leicester!! These jokes all do the rounds though, its just a case of change em to order!!
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Post by GeoFox on Apr 5, 2006 20:13:02 GMT -1
So its like that then is it Gresley! LL is obv having an impact on you too! not really geo, as you will see by the last joke, i didnt even mention leicester!! These jokes all do the rounds though, its just a case of change em to order!! lol well this one has to be derby I'm afraid: A Derby fan is trapped on a remote desert island with a sheep and a dog. Soon, the sheep starts looking really attractive to the Derby fan. However, whenever he approaches a sheep the dog growls in a threatening manner. The Derby fan takes the dog to the opposite side of the island giving it some food as a distraction. He runs back to the sheep only to find the dog growling at him. The Derby fan ties the dog to a tree with a large leash. He goes back to the sheep only to find the dog growling with a gnawed off leash around its neck. By now, the Derby fan is getting depressed and frustrated. As he sits under a palm tree staring out to sea, a beautiful woman in a tight-fitting wet suit emerges from the surf. She asks him who he is and, taking pity upon his lonely state, asks if there's ANYTHING she could do for him. The Derby fan thinks for a moment and then responds, "Could you take the dog for a walk?
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Post by GresleyRam©®™ on Apr 5, 2006 20:15:52 GMT -1
not really geo, as you will see by the last joke, i didnt even mention leicester!! These jokes all do the rounds though, its just a case of change em to order!! lol well this one has to be derby I'm afraid: A Derby fan is trapped on a remote desert island with a sheep and a dog. Soon, the sheep starts looking really attractive to the Derby fan. However, whenever he approaches a sheep the dog growls in a threatening manner. The Derby fan takes the dog to the opposite side of the island giving it some food as a distraction. He runs back to the sheep only to find the dog growling at him. The Derby fan ties the dog to a tree with a large leash. He goes back to the sheep only to find the dog growling with a gnawed off leash around its neck. By now, the Derby fan is getting depressed and frustrated. As he sits under a palm tree staring out to sea, a beautiful woman in a tight-fitting wet suit emerges from the surf. She asks him who he is and, taking pity upon his lonely state, asks if there's ANYTHING she could do for him. The Derby fan thinks for a moment and then responds, "Could you take the dog for a walk? nice ;D
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Post by GeoFox on Apr 5, 2006 20:19:45 GMT -1
Arnold the Forest fan is walking his dog one day, when he sees an old lamp. He bends down to pick it up, and starts to rub it to clean it. Suddenly, a genie appears, and says, "I am the economy-price genie?" I grant but one wish". Arnold thinks for a while, and then says, "Make my dog Red, win Crufts." The genie looks at Red and says, "Don’t be stupid, look at the thing. It’s mangy, it’s got fleas, it’s got a bit missing from one ear, it limps and it smells. I might be a genie, but I’m not a miracle worker." "All right then," says Arnold, "Make Nottingham Forest win the FA Cup." The genie stops for a moment, then says, "Let’s have another look at that dog again.
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Post by GeoFox on Apr 5, 2006 20:24:16 GMT -1
A primary teacher starts a new job in Nottingham and, trying to make a good impression on her first day, explains to her class that she is a Nottingham Forest fan. She asks her students to raise their hands if they too are Forest fans. Everyone in the class raises their hand except one little girl. The teacher looks at the girl with surprise and says: “Mary, why didn't you raise your hand?“ "Because I'm not a Forest fan miss,“ she replies. The teacher, still shocked, asked: “Well, if you're not a Forest fan, then who are you a fan of?“ "I'm a Leicester fan, and proud of it,“ Mary replied. The teacher could not believe her ears. “Mary, why, pray tell, are you a Leicester fan?“ "Because my mum and dad are from Leicester, and my mum is a City fan, my dad is a City fan, so I'm a City fan too!“ “Well,“ said the teacher, in an obviously annoyed tone, “that's no reason for you to be a Leicester fan. You don't have to be just like your parents all of the time! What if your mum was a prostitute and your dad was a drug addict and car thief? What would you be then?“ "Then,“ Mary smiled, “I'd be a Forest fan...“
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Post by GeoFox on Apr 5, 2006 20:33:37 GMT -1
The City Ground celebrations were underway on Wednesday when it was announced that groundsman Steve Welch and his team had won the National Groundsman of the Year award. They beat off competition from the other divisional winners - Arsenal, Reading and Macclesfield at an FA lunch in Windsor. Steve said: "I came here from Leicester because I knew I'd have an easy job here. There's so much sh!t out there on Saturday afternoons the pitch takes care of itself."
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Post by saintrich on Apr 5, 2006 20:41:24 GMT -1
why doesnt gregorz rasiak like heading the ball? ![???](//storage.proboards.com/forum/images/smiley/huh.png) it squashes his penis ;D
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Post by saintrich on Apr 5, 2006 20:43:40 GMT -1
truely awful
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