Post by Sterland (S4E) on Jul 6, 2006 21:44:45 GMT -1
Cheers BAGD, think I can guess where some of these have come from... Revenge is best served on a cold platter though so I will be lining up some Prowlers.. 
Right, here ya are..
1. ster have you been shaving since birth?
Have to admit shaving is not part of my daily ritual and I try to do it as little as possible. I did have an ex girlfriend who I wanted to trim down a bit though and her condition was that I shaved mine off to see how I liked it. Scratching my plums all the way through an interview for Aston University made me see the error of that though so I went to Sheffield! Since birth? Not quite..
2. Did you have flushable toilets in the establishments you were incarcerated in - or was it a morning chore to slop out the buckets?
Ah memories! Cheers for that! Each of the cells has it's own toilet but it is uncomfortable and embarrassing. Waking at 4 in the morning to your padmates smelly shit in summer is not fun.. Never had to 'slop out' though Cayman jail was a trap toilet on automatic flush that did it once a day. Four to a pad with 1 shitter and 90 degree heat for 12 hours min every day.. Not good and will never do it again..
3. Before becoming a successful businessman and master craftsman - you achieved a university degree. What was your career ambition when you left uni?
Not succesful yet but cheers for that! Have a degree in Business and Recreation Management and fully intended to go into either community recreation planning or into nightclub management. Had a few issues with both as little money in either unless you get very high and a criminal record from stupid things would block that path. Sort of forced into a new trade but glad it happened..
4. Do you and your wife plan on having kids? If so what names would you choose for either a boy or a girl?
No we won't be having any, we tried for a while but nothing happened and still don't worry if one comes along. But not going to tests or IVF as neither of us want to find out which one of us is responsible for us being childless. We have each other and that is enough for me. (Louis and Caroline though)
5. What are your favourite three Malt Whiskys?
Easy Ro!! Laphroig, Scapa and Craigellachie. All ages..
6. Sterland - what sort of drugs have you dabbled with?
Smoked a lot of weed, done quite a lot of coke, and munched many pills. Acid maybe four or five times and the same with crystal when I was in America. Never to an addictive state though, purely recreational. Not done anything for a long time now.
7. What age did you lose your virginity?
16, with someone I really cared about too. Fuck me did she open a pandoras box for me though! If I had known that it felt like that down there I would have happily chased skirt aged 8!
8. Whats the heaviest weight of a bird you've shagged?
Couldn't tell you for sure, but there has been a few big girls! Still, quite happy with all of my partners wether it was for one night or for ever like I have now. Worked a few doors in my time and show me a doorman that hasn't had a roll around with someone not their type but with a filthy reputation and I will show you a liar!
9. Are you gonna get a Robin Reliant for a motor?
Ha!!! Might need to in 11 months time when the powers let me back on the road!! I leased my car to a friend for 500 a month as I didn't want to take the hit on depreciation, that way I have it to come back to in 11 months.. Quite fancy a Robin though, howw cool is that?!
10. What is your Favourite Sitcom?
As sad as it is I am a big fan of the American ones.. All of them but to pick one I would say Frasier.
11. You are stuck on a dessert island you can take one male and one female 606er which one's?
Fuck.... On a dessert island? What's it made out of? Not sure on that as I get on really well with all the prowlers and a lot of the daytime crew. If you put a gun to my head I would say Roaster as he has a similar sort of sense of humour and female wise either AC, Sooz or shins.. Which ever has the biggest tits! ;D
12. Which Leeds game are you most looking forward this coming season?
Easy... Birmingham away. Have been to Brum on many occasions and I hate everything about the club from the owners to the manager to the stadium to the players. Everything... I would sacrifice all my away games (4-6 a year) to see a win there..
13. You have just won £10,000,000 on the lottey what is the first thing you would buy?
Bigger houses and stuff for my close family, a football club (non league), a nightclub and a small independent distillery in the highlands.
14. Does being a dwarf have an adverse effect when pulling chicks?
Nice!! Not tried to pull a chick for a while now but I guess my minature 6'2" frame may hinder me!
15. Does being a dwarf mean you get to pay half fairs on the bus?
Only just got back to taking a bus now! I hadn't been on a bus for close to fifteen years and I have done it 3 times in a month now. Fucking horrible too.. Spit on the floor and dirty seats and shit. Gammy fingerprinted handrails and gum on that little button that makes the driver stop.. Awful, fucking awful..
16. Does being a dwarf mean you cant go on most rides at Alton Towers?
Depends on wether I take my knife with me!
17. Was your accident really caused by the fact you couldnt see over the steering wheel, and not by a tubby bird in a corsa?
That whore cost me a lot by changing my life while she changed a cd... Shit thing is that I saw her whilst out having a meal and the cheeky bitch sent a drink over to me and my lady and then came over and apologised again! My lady gave her the drink back and said 'Thanks for the offer, but if you are following us out of the car park I'd rather not have alcohol on my breath' Fucking class!
18. Does being a dwarf mean that you get to sit in a 'designated' area at football grounds?
I put on a limp too and get those good seats right at the front.. You know the ones with wheels on them?
19. You’re on a desert island with Shinny, Mrs H, Hulsey, JJ and BAGD – to whom do you feed your last piece of cheese?
Note: it’s red Leicester, lightly smoked. You are not hungry in the slightest
Mmmm, who is the person that needs cheese out of that motley crue? I'd give it to Hulsey, he could warm it up and melt it down to put on his hair for those 'dapper dan' looks..
20. At a recent pub quiz for a tie-break question I was asked "What C would you associate with Jeremy Clarkson?" I confidently replied "c**t" only to be told I was incorrect and I lost the prize. To this day I believe it was the correct answer. Would you have given me the prize?
Depends on the prize.. If the prize was 3 three minute rounds with Jeremey Clarkson or Jimmy Carr with no gloves and in a cage then I would have to say yes. Fuck it, have the prize anyway..
21. I recently went on a trip to The Congo. I didn't once see anyone drinking Um-Bongo. Am I within my rights to sue the manufacturers for false advertising?
I would. false advertising really pisses me off and it must be stopped. I saw an advert on TV the other day for Hoover and I though 'Fuck, that's a great idea..I MUST get one.' So, off to Comet I went, bought the fucker and got home.. Opened the box and couldn't believe they had left out the woman who pushes it around.... I have referred it to my lawyer as Hoover told me to go fuck myself...
22. What do you think about the idea of other dimensions and quantum physics?
It keeps me awake at night funnily enough, quantum physics espsecially as there are so many aspects to it from the quantum side and the physics side. On the quantum side there is a clear and definitive link to the physics side but I have to admit I sometimes struggle to provide any conclusive correlation between the patterns of other dimensions and the phisicality of thw quantum itself... Probably...
My bit done! You all now know a little more about me, who's next? ;D
Right, here ya are..1. ster have you been shaving since birth?
Have to admit shaving is not part of my daily ritual and I try to do it as little as possible. I did have an ex girlfriend who I wanted to trim down a bit though and her condition was that I shaved mine off to see how I liked it. Scratching my plums all the way through an interview for Aston University made me see the error of that though so I went to Sheffield! Since birth? Not quite..
2. Did you have flushable toilets in the establishments you were incarcerated in - or was it a morning chore to slop out the buckets?
Ah memories! Cheers for that! Each of the cells has it's own toilet but it is uncomfortable and embarrassing. Waking at 4 in the morning to your padmates smelly shit in summer is not fun.. Never had to 'slop out' though Cayman jail was a trap toilet on automatic flush that did it once a day. Four to a pad with 1 shitter and 90 degree heat for 12 hours min every day.. Not good and will never do it again..
3. Before becoming a successful businessman and master craftsman - you achieved a university degree. What was your career ambition when you left uni?
Not succesful yet but cheers for that! Have a degree in Business and Recreation Management and fully intended to go into either community recreation planning or into nightclub management. Had a few issues with both as little money in either unless you get very high and a criminal record from stupid things would block that path. Sort of forced into a new trade but glad it happened..
4. Do you and your wife plan on having kids? If so what names would you choose for either a boy or a girl?
No we won't be having any, we tried for a while but nothing happened and still don't worry if one comes along. But not going to tests or IVF as neither of us want to find out which one of us is responsible for us being childless. We have each other and that is enough for me. (Louis and Caroline though)
5. What are your favourite three Malt Whiskys?
Easy Ro!! Laphroig, Scapa and Craigellachie. All ages..
6. Sterland - what sort of drugs have you dabbled with?
Smoked a lot of weed, done quite a lot of coke, and munched many pills. Acid maybe four or five times and the same with crystal when I was in America. Never to an addictive state though, purely recreational. Not done anything for a long time now.
7. What age did you lose your virginity?
16, with someone I really cared about too. Fuck me did she open a pandoras box for me though! If I had known that it felt like that down there I would have happily chased skirt aged 8!
8. Whats the heaviest weight of a bird you've shagged?
Couldn't tell you for sure, but there has been a few big girls! Still, quite happy with all of my partners wether it was for one night or for ever like I have now. Worked a few doors in my time and show me a doorman that hasn't had a roll around with someone not their type but with a filthy reputation and I will show you a liar!
9. Are you gonna get a Robin Reliant for a motor?
Ha!!! Might need to in 11 months time when the powers let me back on the road!! I leased my car to a friend for 500 a month as I didn't want to take the hit on depreciation, that way I have it to come back to in 11 months.. Quite fancy a Robin though, howw cool is that?!
10. What is your Favourite Sitcom?
As sad as it is I am a big fan of the American ones.. All of them but to pick one I would say Frasier.
11. You are stuck on a dessert island you can take one male and one female 606er which one's?
Fuck.... On a dessert island? What's it made out of? Not sure on that as I get on really well with all the prowlers and a lot of the daytime crew. If you put a gun to my head I would say Roaster as he has a similar sort of sense of humour and female wise either AC, Sooz or shins.. Which ever has the biggest tits! ;D
12. Which Leeds game are you most looking forward this coming season?
Easy... Birmingham away. Have been to Brum on many occasions and I hate everything about the club from the owners to the manager to the stadium to the players. Everything... I would sacrifice all my away games (4-6 a year) to see a win there..
13. You have just won £10,000,000 on the lottey what is the first thing you would buy?
Bigger houses and stuff for my close family, a football club (non league), a nightclub and a small independent distillery in the highlands.
14. Does being a dwarf have an adverse effect when pulling chicks?
Nice!! Not tried to pull a chick for a while now but I guess my minature 6'2" frame may hinder me!
15. Does being a dwarf mean you get to pay half fairs on the bus?
Only just got back to taking a bus now! I hadn't been on a bus for close to fifteen years and I have done it 3 times in a month now. Fucking horrible too.. Spit on the floor and dirty seats and shit. Gammy fingerprinted handrails and gum on that little button that makes the driver stop.. Awful, fucking awful..
16. Does being a dwarf mean you cant go on most rides at Alton Towers?
Depends on wether I take my knife with me!
17. Was your accident really caused by the fact you couldnt see over the steering wheel, and not by a tubby bird in a corsa?
That whore cost me a lot by changing my life while she changed a cd... Shit thing is that I saw her whilst out having a meal and the cheeky bitch sent a drink over to me and my lady and then came over and apologised again! My lady gave her the drink back and said 'Thanks for the offer, but if you are following us out of the car park I'd rather not have alcohol on my breath' Fucking class!
18. Does being a dwarf mean that you get to sit in a 'designated' area at football grounds?
I put on a limp too and get those good seats right at the front.. You know the ones with wheels on them?
19. You’re on a desert island with Shinny, Mrs H, Hulsey, JJ and BAGD – to whom do you feed your last piece of cheese?
Note: it’s red Leicester, lightly smoked. You are not hungry in the slightest
Mmmm, who is the person that needs cheese out of that motley crue? I'd give it to Hulsey, he could warm it up and melt it down to put on his hair for those 'dapper dan' looks..
20. At a recent pub quiz for a tie-break question I was asked "What C would you associate with Jeremy Clarkson?" I confidently replied "c**t" only to be told I was incorrect and I lost the prize. To this day I believe it was the correct answer. Would you have given me the prize?
Depends on the prize.. If the prize was 3 three minute rounds with Jeremey Clarkson or Jimmy Carr with no gloves and in a cage then I would have to say yes. Fuck it, have the prize anyway..
21. I recently went on a trip to The Congo. I didn't once see anyone drinking Um-Bongo. Am I within my rights to sue the manufacturers for false advertising?
I would. false advertising really pisses me off and it must be stopped. I saw an advert on TV the other day for Hoover and I though 'Fuck, that's a great idea..I MUST get one.' So, off to Comet I went, bought the fucker and got home.. Opened the box and couldn't believe they had left out the woman who pushes it around.... I have referred it to my lawyer as Hoover told me to go fuck myself...
22. What do you think about the idea of other dimensions and quantum physics?
It keeps me awake at night funnily enough, quantum physics espsecially as there are so many aspects to it from the quantum side and the physics side. On the quantum side there is a clear and definitive link to the physics side but I have to admit I sometimes struggle to provide any conclusive correlation between the patterns of other dimensions and the phisicality of thw quantum itself... Probably...
My bit done! You all now know a little more about me, who's next? ;D
Catch y'all laters
