Post by Mrs H on Jun 5, 2006 7:20:14 GMT -1
1. If you could be any other 606 poster, who would you be and why??
It would probably be Billy. I would teach him to be more confident about himself, give his witch of a boss a big slap for being a cow and get him laid!
2. When was the last time you did a monster that wouldn't flush?
About 3 weeks ago and it blocked toilet at work so I legged it before anyone could suss it was me.
3. Mrs H, does the fin ever "get in the way"...or is it a big turn on for Mr H?
No Stanley, the fin is fine thanks. Mr H likes it as he has a strange shark fetish!
4. Mrs H, do you think that there is any truth in the following statement:
The angle of dangle is directly proportional to the heat of the meat? ...and what size feet have you got?
No it not what you’ve got it what you do with it that counts and I have size 5 feet (quite little for a tall person).
5. Mrs H. What do you find more alluring in a fella:
A. being able to change a car tyre in 3 minutes flat, or
B. Owning a large selection of power tools... preferably Bosch or Black & Decker, or
C. Soft gentle hands (from washing up), or
D. A couch potato who screams "where's me dinner you fat bitch"?
Fat Bitch!!
I think the answer would have to be C. If he’s got soft hands he can put them to better use than just the washing up…there’s plenty of ironing to be done as well.
6. Mrs H, have you ever read a book at bedtime that has left you feeling highly aroused? If so, which book was it... and can you describe the feelings you had in no more than 30 words.
I believe it was the Mr Men book of Mr Strong. He’s a big lad, likes his eggs. I was aroused at his ability to put fires out by picking a barn up and filling it with water. The feelings I had were satifying and left me with a craving for eggs.
7. Mrs H, which of the following do you think is the greatest invention, and why?
A. nylon
B. steel
C. the wheel
D. stealers wheel
E. the rampant rabbit (well there's always got to be a pervy spin!)
Well being a Sheffielder it would have to be steel otherwise our fine city would be more like Rotherham and that is never a good thing. I’ve never had a rampant rabbit so I wouldn’t know. But my birthday is in December…
8. When did you start following football?
I was enrolled in the Young Owls members club the day after I was born. My mum and dad had their wedding reception at Hillsboro and the house I was brought up in was overlooked Hillsboro. So I really didn’t stand a chance did I. I started to go to the matches when I was 8 and have had a season ticket since I was 12.
9. If you could be one of the male posters on 606, who would you be and why?
I’ve sort of answered this one…
10. If you were the Chairperson of your club and you had £20million to spend on players, which players would you buy and which players would you sell to make way for the new signings ?
I’d sell David Graham for about 25p just to get rid of the workshy useless twat. Same goes for Whelan and Brunt. Don’t think I could get Stevie G for £20 million…I’d offer Dennis Bergkamp a short term contract to come and get us out of the Championship. Buy Scott Carson as a long term prospect. If I could afford him I buy Hleb from Arsenal. Think he’s been a revelation this season. Then I’d offer my services to John Terry and pay him in kind… ;D
11. What is your favourite holiday destination and why?
I went to the Maldives a couple of years ago a fell in love with it there. The place is absolute paradise. I’m a traveller at heart so I’ve been to a fair few places. Brazil was amazing purely for the people. The town I stayed in went to church on Tuesdays and then had a carnival every Tuesday night. How cool is that!!!
12. When was the last time you were really drunk? and I mean utterly shit faced?
Probably last year. I won 2 weeks in Portugal and took my best friend. We went out and we were in an Irish pub. I fell down the stairs in the pub, threatened to sue and the barman gave me and my mate free drinks all night. I woke up 2 days later. Apparently I was dancing with a lot of golfers, knocked a flaming sambuca over the bar and set it on fire and when the landlord gave us a lift back to our hotel I was sick in his brand new BMW. Successful evening! ;D
13. What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done in your life?
Played for Sheffield United Girl’s team when I was 10. My cousin played for them and they were short in a tournament and I ended up playing. I did however refuse to wear the shirt and played in my Wednesday trackie top!!
14. Now really Mrs H.....your an OWL.....so what you doing posting in the day!?
Because this Owl doesn’t have the t’internet at home
15. If you could experience a day in the life of any poster on here who would you choose and why?
I think I’d like to live a day in Cav’s shoes. All that lady pleasing, blatant woooing and opening up a can of whoop ass on people must be quite entertaining.
16. If you went on an all girls holiday, would you behave yourself baring in mind what can happen?
I have never cheated on any of my fella’s so yes I would behave myself.
17. What would be your ideal weapon to inflict punishment on Morton?
Well at first I was thinking a read hot poker up the arse but he’d probably like that. I think I’d get Paul Sturrock to sit on his face for a few hours after having some haggis.
18. Who is your favourite male poster on 606?
I can’t pick a favourite they’re all different. Billy I chat to a lot and just think he is one of the genuinely nice people in the world. On the opposite end of the spectrum I think Cav is amazing and has been making me laugh since the old 606 times.
19. What is your favourite sexual position, because it's been said that d-style is your favourite?
Where have you got that information??? I would have to say me on top.
20. Cosy, romantic night in or a wild night out?
Cosy romantic night. Good food, wine, film. Not too shabby! (I find that mad night’s out get me into trouble, refer to question 12 for further info)
21. Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?
Married, with kids teaching them that Sheffield Wednesday are the greatest team to ever walk the planet and that football isn’t about having fun and winning.
22. There are two people unconscious, unfortunately you have to save one by giving them the 'Kiss of Life', but which one out of Warnock or Morton?
God this is harsh I suppose Morton but don’t take this as a sign of affection rent boy!
23. Which of the Male Prowlers would you most like to go out for a curry with?
Probably you GFJ! But there wouldn’t be any window action….
24. when answering this question DO NOT include the question in your post. Choose from the following two statements:
I Mrs David Hirst, being of sound mind and unneccessarily itchy, claim today my rightful place as the head of the Church of Celine Dion. This cult has strange rituals which I enjoy thrice nightly. These include getting naked and covering my breasts with colgate toothpaste to the sound of the titanic theme, and using my poo to collate a statue of Ms Dion in my living room. Myself and Mr Hirst often make the beast with two backs to the sound of 'Don't say what you're about to say' with myself taking the role of Celine and Mr H doing the BVs. We hope shortly to holiday in Canada, the place of her birth, and Switzerland, her Eurovisual adopted nation, whence upon we shall streak through the streets doing impressions of Michael Aspel, and throwing Pommegranites at confused locals.
My devotion to Ms Dion is so great that I would kill to be beside her for the mearest second, and intend to do so shortly. So watch your back if you come between me and my love for Celine. After all, this IS getting serious!
Thanks Shippers!
It would probably be Billy. I would teach him to be more confident about himself, give his witch of a boss a big slap for being a cow and get him laid!
2. When was the last time you did a monster that wouldn't flush?
About 3 weeks ago and it blocked toilet at work so I legged it before anyone could suss it was me.
3. Mrs H, does the fin ever "get in the way"...or is it a big turn on for Mr H?
No Stanley, the fin is fine thanks. Mr H likes it as he has a strange shark fetish!
4. Mrs H, do you think that there is any truth in the following statement:
The angle of dangle is directly proportional to the heat of the meat? ...and what size feet have you got?
No it not what you’ve got it what you do with it that counts and I have size 5 feet (quite little for a tall person).
5. Mrs H. What do you find more alluring in a fella:
A. being able to change a car tyre in 3 minutes flat, or
B. Owning a large selection of power tools... preferably Bosch or Black & Decker, or
C. Soft gentle hands (from washing up), or
D. A couch potato who screams "where's me dinner you fat bitch"?
Fat Bitch!!
I think the answer would have to be C. If he’s got soft hands he can put them to better use than just the washing up…there’s plenty of ironing to be done as well.6. Mrs H, have you ever read a book at bedtime that has left you feeling highly aroused? If so, which book was it... and can you describe the feelings you had in no more than 30 words.
I believe it was the Mr Men book of Mr Strong. He’s a big lad, likes his eggs. I was aroused at his ability to put fires out by picking a barn up and filling it with water. The feelings I had were satifying and left me with a craving for eggs.
7. Mrs H, which of the following do you think is the greatest invention, and why?
A. nylon
B. steel
C. the wheel
D. stealers wheel
E. the rampant rabbit (well there's always got to be a pervy spin!)
Well being a Sheffielder it would have to be steel otherwise our fine city would be more like Rotherham and that is never a good thing. I’ve never had a rampant rabbit so I wouldn’t know. But my birthday is in December…
8. When did you start following football?
I was enrolled in the Young Owls members club the day after I was born. My mum and dad had their wedding reception at Hillsboro and the house I was brought up in was overlooked Hillsboro. So I really didn’t stand a chance did I. I started to go to the matches when I was 8 and have had a season ticket since I was 12.
9. If you could be one of the male posters on 606, who would you be and why?
I’ve sort of answered this one…
10. If you were the Chairperson of your club and you had £20million to spend on players, which players would you buy and which players would you sell to make way for the new signings ?
I’d sell David Graham for about 25p just to get rid of the workshy useless twat. Same goes for Whelan and Brunt. Don’t think I could get Stevie G for £20 million…I’d offer Dennis Bergkamp a short term contract to come and get us out of the Championship. Buy Scott Carson as a long term prospect. If I could afford him I buy Hleb from Arsenal. Think he’s been a revelation this season. Then I’d offer my services to John Terry and pay him in kind… ;D
11. What is your favourite holiday destination and why?
I went to the Maldives a couple of years ago a fell in love with it there. The place is absolute paradise. I’m a traveller at heart so I’ve been to a fair few places. Brazil was amazing purely for the people. The town I stayed in went to church on Tuesdays and then had a carnival every Tuesday night. How cool is that!!!
12. When was the last time you were really drunk? and I mean utterly shit faced?
Probably last year. I won 2 weeks in Portugal and took my best friend. We went out and we were in an Irish pub. I fell down the stairs in the pub, threatened to sue and the barman gave me and my mate free drinks all night. I woke up 2 days later. Apparently I was dancing with a lot of golfers, knocked a flaming sambuca over the bar and set it on fire and when the landlord gave us a lift back to our hotel I was sick in his brand new BMW. Successful evening! ;D
13. What's the most embarrassing thing you've ever done in your life?
Played for Sheffield United Girl’s team when I was 10. My cousin played for them and they were short in a tournament and I ended up playing. I did however refuse to wear the shirt and played in my Wednesday trackie top!!
14. Now really Mrs H.....your an OWL.....so what you doing posting in the day!?
Because this Owl doesn’t have the t’internet at home
15. If you could experience a day in the life of any poster on here who would you choose and why?
I think I’d like to live a day in Cav’s shoes. All that lady pleasing, blatant woooing and opening up a can of whoop ass on people must be quite entertaining.
16. If you went on an all girls holiday, would you behave yourself baring in mind what can happen?
I have never cheated on any of my fella’s so yes I would behave myself.
17. What would be your ideal weapon to inflict punishment on Morton?
Well at first I was thinking a read hot poker up the arse but he’d probably like that. I think I’d get Paul Sturrock to sit on his face for a few hours after having some haggis.
18. Who is your favourite male poster on 606?
I can’t pick a favourite they’re all different. Billy I chat to a lot and just think he is one of the genuinely nice people in the world. On the opposite end of the spectrum I think Cav is amazing and has been making me laugh since the old 606 times.
19. What is your favourite sexual position, because it's been said that d-style is your favourite?
Where have you got that information??? I would have to say me on top.
20. Cosy, romantic night in or a wild night out?
Cosy romantic night. Good food, wine, film. Not too shabby! (I find that mad night’s out get me into trouble, refer to question 12 for further info)
21. Where do you see yourself in 5 years time?
Married, with kids teaching them that Sheffield Wednesday are the greatest team to ever walk the planet and that football isn’t about having fun and winning.
22. There are two people unconscious, unfortunately you have to save one by giving them the 'Kiss of Life', but which one out of Warnock or Morton?
God this is harsh I suppose Morton but don’t take this as a sign of affection rent boy!
23. Which of the Male Prowlers would you most like to go out for a curry with?
Probably you GFJ! But there wouldn’t be any window action….
24. when answering this question DO NOT include the question in your post. Choose from the following two statements:
I Mrs David Hirst, being of sound mind and unneccessarily itchy, claim today my rightful place as the head of the Church of Celine Dion. This cult has strange rituals which I enjoy thrice nightly. These include getting naked and covering my breasts with colgate toothpaste to the sound of the titanic theme, and using my poo to collate a statue of Ms Dion in my living room. Myself and Mr Hirst often make the beast with two backs to the sound of 'Don't say what you're about to say' with myself taking the role of Celine and Mr H doing the BVs. We hope shortly to holiday in Canada, the place of her birth, and Switzerland, her Eurovisual adopted nation, whence upon we shall streak through the streets doing impressions of Michael Aspel, and throwing Pommegranites at confused locals.
My devotion to Ms Dion is so great that I would kill to be beside her for the mearest second, and intend to do so shortly. So watch your back if you come between me and my love for Celine. After all, this IS getting serious!
Thanks Shippers!
Forever without exception. x
